i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
