I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
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