so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
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