His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
