sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
