people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Randomize
