They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
