I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
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