That's when you crack a 10am beer
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
