But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Randomize
