After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize