discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
