Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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