dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Randomize
