are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize