She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize
