I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
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