doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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