So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize
