So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
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