Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
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