Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
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