Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize
