No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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