Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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