Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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