i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Just pee around me
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I love you.
Bad choice
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
