no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
