I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
