Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
