More tranny stories later!
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
