i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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