I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
