My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Randomize
