I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
