i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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