Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize