I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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