i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
