that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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