So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
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