In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
ok first of all what the fuck
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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