is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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