I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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