Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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