We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Randomize