dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
