If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
