he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
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