This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
