I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Oh god it's open bar.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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