im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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