Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Randomize
